So here they are, the 10 Commandments for Husbands:
1. Remember that thy wife is thy partner and not thy property.What do you think?
2. Do not expect thy wife to be wife and wage earner at the same time.
3. Think not that thy business is none of thy wife's business.
4. Thou shalt hold thy wife's love by the same means that thou won it.
5. Thou shalt make the building of thy home thy first business.
6. Thou shalt cooperate with thy wife in establishing family discipline.
7. Thou shalt enter into thy house with cheerfulness.
8. Thou shalt not let anyone criticize thy wife to thy face and get away with it; neither thy father, nor thy mother, nor thy brethren, nor thy sisters, nor thy children.
9. Thou shalt be in subjection to Christ in all things so thy wife may find joy in being in subjection to you.
10. Thou shalt keep thy marriage vows with all diligence as a sacred covenant between thee, thy wife, and God.
"Husbands, love your wives." Ephesians 5:25
I'll only comment on the 9th commandment for now:
Thou shalt be in subjection to Christ in all things so thy wife may find joy in being in subjection to you.
While it is good that a husband be in subjection to Christ in all things, this statement is unbiblical and manipulative.
There is no need for a wife to be motivated to submit to her husband by her husband. In fact, it is essential that the only motivation be a desire to be obedient to God. In obedience and faithfulness, there will be joy.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. - Galatians 5:22-23And one of my most favorite verses in the Bible:
His lord said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant; you have been faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.’ - Matthew 25:23You might be thinking, but SD, I thought you enjoyed being in submission to your husband. And, indeed, I do...but not because of him. The decision to turn away from rebellion has nothing to do with him...it can't. Since it has nothing to do with him, and there is nothing he can do to earn or lose my submission, it is ludicrous to suggest that he should do something so that I may find joy in submitting to him.
I find joy in submitting to him - period - end of sentence.
There is no "...because he does X, Y, or Z," including "...because he submits to Christ in all things."
The joy is the fruit of the Spirit. The joy is in walking in obedience to God. The joy is in turning away from rebellion.
Now I said I'd only comment on the 9th commandment but reading it over again, something must be said about the 3rd:
Think not that thy business is none of thy wife's business.
In light of what I said above, the extent to which our Husband's submission to Christ is our business as wives, is in what we pray for. I pray for my husband a lot. It is a broad prayer that covers "whatever it is he needs to be strengthened in." I do not, however, find it any of my business what he prays for. I am not equipped to be his confidant in spiritual matters, nor his guide or teacher. He does not share with me the intimate details of his walk with Christ. In that I can say, assuredly, that his business is none of my business.